Turns Out They Do Come With A "How To" Manual! (Kind of)

If I had a dollar for every time I heard my mom, or boss, or that old lady at Wal-mart say "we never had that when I had my kids"  I probably wouldn't be foreclosing on my house. Calm down, mom, I'm not complaining. It's the truth. Disposable diapers didn't exist let alone fancy car seats, or video monitors or Yo Gabba Gabba. And honestly, I think I could probably do without most of this.

What I couldn't do without is all the information. EVERYTHING has been researched and studied and researched again, and found to be previously incorrect, and corrected and put in a book, or on a blog, or a website, or answered by some lady named "Bobbysmommy33" on Yahoo Answers.

My current problem is that I'm at the end of my book. I had the pregnancy books and the first years books and now what? Is there a year two manual? I mean, there better be? The nerd in me needs another book! I have no idea what to do with the "second years" Tegan! When will she form sentences, and how do I deal with big girl beds and feces throwing (See! I can't even seem to remember if I'm raising a one year old human or a chimp!)

I mean, Josh and I had pretty much zero experience with kids prior to Miss Tegan...I mean, really zero. I can't actually recall having changed a diaper...ever. And while I may write like I'm some bad ass, go with the flow kind of mom (which I am), I have to be educated on anything I take on. Even if I decide what I read was total garbage. So I need the books.

While I do realize the Internet and other forms of 21st century research will still exist in 8 days, and my ability to google "how many wet diapers should a 12 month old that's weaning but drinks water have" and get an exact answer, I liked the comfort that came with the monthly manual. The feeling of "so that is normal...huh...good to know" when I would read the chapter for her point in development. Or the even better feeling of "I knew my kid was going to be a fucking genius" when she had reached milestones 2 and 3 chapters ahead.

So maybe I can't get a month-by-month breakdown of what (not so) Baby Bird is likely to unveil next.  Maybe that's okay. This last year of parenting has really lead to me feeling like I know Tegan, and that I can handle anything she can throw at me. Perhaps I can even handle it on instinct. And just maybe I'll decide I don't need a book at all. I mean, how much harder can a one year old really be?

(Can someone tell me which chapter covers desk climbing?)